Who do you love
by rita louise evans
Summary: Lucas is getting married to Brooke but with Peyton coming back into his life will he ruin everything for his ex or will he realise what he's doing before he loses the love of his life.
1. Chapter 1

**Who do you love**

**Prologue **

Brooke and Lucas have been together for two years now and they've decided to get married. The only problem now is Lucas seemes to be getting cold feet and with the wedding only a few days away can he work through them especially when he still has feeling for Brooke's best friend Peyton.

But one thing Lucas's is shore of Brooke can never find out about the kiss because it would destroy her and that's the last thing in the world he wants to do. It all started three months ago when Peyton moved back to Tree Hill and started working at Tric with his mom. They shared an office and they just grew closer and now he was so confused he loved Brooke but he had feelings for Peyton too he just didn't know what to do about it.

Brooke could sense there was something Lucas was keeping from her, it seemed he was always working and when she tried to talk to him it was like he was too tired. Haley suggested it was pre wedding jitters and that he really wanted to finish his new novel and as soon as he was finished everything would go back to how it was before.

**Chapter 1**

Lucas has to be in the church in twenty minutes but he doesn't know what to do right now he was so confused. He knows he loves Brooke and the last thing in the world he wants to do is hurt her but he didn't know whether he could go through the wedding if he's got feelings for Peyton. He thought a couple of days away with his brother would help clear his head but it didn't and it doesn't help with Peyton in his ear all the time telling his they should be together.

"Lucas what are you still doing here" Karen asked she only came home to get her bag she didn't expect Lucas to be there.

"Mom I don't know if I can do this" Lucas sighed as he put his head in his hands.

"Do what Luke" Karen asked confused.

"Marry Brooke" Lucas stumbled now the words were out there he knew he couldn't take them back.

"Lucas don't be silly you love Brooke it's just pre wedding jitters trust me once you get up to the alter and see her you'll be fine. I know you and Brooke belong together I've seen then love you two share" Karen smiled.

"I know I love her mom but marriage is such a strong commitment I don't know if I can do it" Lucas sighed he knew he couldn't tell his mom about the kiss with Peyton because he knew she'd tell him to be honest with Brooke and he really didn't want to hurt her again.

"Of course you can, Luke I've got to go I'm meeting Brooke and Haley I'll see you at the church" Karen said as she grabbed her bag she knew everything would be ok because most men suffered from nerves before the wedding.

When Brooke got to the church the driver drove round the block a few times which Brooke thought was weird and she was wondering what in the hell is going on.

"Haley what's going on" Brooke asked none of this was making sense and the last thing she wanted was to be late to her wedding.

"Oh a few things aren't quite ready yet" Haley lied she was going to kill Lucas when she got hold of him when Nathan text her saying Lucas wasn't there yet she had to think of something. How could he be late on a day like this it didn't make sense?

"Haley I don't care I just want to get married we are not going around again" Brooke said getting annoyed.

"Ok, ok" Haley said as she text Nathan to say they were coming.

Nathan was going to kill Lucas for being late because he knew somehow this would end up his fault as his best man. He knew Lucas was having second thoughts about things but to be late he needed to be a man about things not run away.

"Hey Nate" Lucas said he knew he had to do the right thing he couldn't be like his dad he'd made a promise to Brooke and he was going to see it through.

"Where the hell have you been your half an hour late Brooke is probably wondering what in the hell is going on what were you thinking" Nathan said trying to keep his voice down not wanting the whole church to know what was going on.

"I just needed some time I'm fine now" Lucas whispered as the wedding song came on and he saw Brooke walking down the aisle he'd never seen her look more beautiful.

"We're gathered here today to witness the union of two people destined for each other Lucas Eugene Scott and Brooke Penelope Davis, they both have something they'd like to say" the minister smiled.

"Lucas I have loved you from the very first moment I saw you and I know we've been through some good and bad times but I know no matter what things may came our way we will get through them together. You make me believe in love, I've never really felt special before but you make me feel special everyday and I promise you I'm going to spend the rest of my like making you feel the same way" Brooke smiled all day she was thinking about what to say and Haley was right when the time come the words will come right out.

"Brooke, I, I really don't know what to say" Lucas stumbled as he saw Peyton walk through the door this wasn't good he knew he had to say something.

After standing there for a few moments Nathan nudged Lucas something had to break him from his trance this wasn't looking good Brooke was confused and she didn't disserve this.

"What" Lucas said as he turned to Nathan.

"Lucas what's wrong with you" Nathan said getting annoyed this wasn't right he knew he had to do something.

"Nothing, nothing's wrong" Lucas said.

"Will someone please tell me what's going on" Brooke asked confused.

"Brooke I have something to tell you" Nathan started to say but was cut off.

"Nothing its nothing Brooke lets continue" Lucas said trying to salvage everything.

"No it's not nothing Nathan what do you want to say" Brooke asked she couldn't believe she was going through this at a time like this.

"I hate to tell you this Brooke" Nathan sighed he didn't want to see her hurt.

"Nathan don't" Lucas said stopping his brother it couldn't come out like this.

"He can't marry you he's in love with me" Peyton yelled.

"What, Lucas please tell me this isn't true not again" Brooke cried.

Lucas just stood there how could things turn so wrong so fast he must have been standing there for quite a while because when he finally realised what was going on Brooke was gone and he finally saw what an idiot he was being and now he's lost the love of his life.

"Brooke wait" Lucas yelled as he went after her.

As Brooke got outside she stopped she knew she needed to say something to him but how she was so hurt right now she didn't think she'd ever felt like this.

"Brooke please" Lucas pleaded.

"How could you why, why Peyton, of all people how could you do this to me" Brooke cried.

"Nothing is going on I swear come on lets go back inside and get married" Lucas pleaded hoping she would he'd finally realised she's the one he can't live without.

"What was going on in the Lucas and don't lie to me, Nathan was trying to tell me something what was it" Brooke asked she needed to know.

"Ok over the last through weeks I was doubting myself but now I've realised I never want to lose you, please Brooke marry me and I promise you I'll never doubt us again" Lucas begged he didn't care if he sounded pathetic he need Brooke like he needed air.

"I can't deal with right now" Brooke said as she walked off she wanted to believe his she did but he's been acting strange for weeks now and she really thought that once they were married things would go back to how things were before but she couldn't have been more wrong.

"Brooke please don't do this" Lucas pleaded as she walked away.

"Nathan what the hell is going on" Haley asked as she came back in the church Brooke wanted to be on her own right now.

"Please don't kill me but Lucas didn't want to get married over the last few days he told me he wasn't ready, with him being late and then not being able to say his vows I knew I had to do something" Nathan sighed he didn't think he should tell Haley about the kiss because she kill him for telling Lucas to lie but he didn't think all this was going to happen.

"Oh god, Nathan you should have said something to me I really don't know how they're going to come back from this and what was with Peyton's outburst if he's cheating on Brooke again I'm going to kill him" Haley sighed she couldn't believe this all happened.

End of chapter please review and tell me what you think thanks


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for all the reviews.**

**Chapter 2**

When Lucas got home after looking for Brooke for the last few hours he found her packing some stuff in a bag.

"Brooke please don't do this I love you, we can work this out" Lucas cried as he walked over towards her.

"I have too I can't stay" Brooke cried this was the only thing she could think to do right now he'd hurt her so bad this time today was supposed to be the happiest day of her life and it turned into the worst.

"Please Brooke I love you I want to marry you more than anything let's just go get married I don't care where we get married let's just do it please" Lucas begged as he got down on his knees.

"If you really wanted to marry me why didn't you, why was I put through this today" Brooke asked she needed to know.

"I got scared I don't know why I just felt like maybe we were rushing things but I was wrong" Lucas sighed he thought about telling her about Peyton but right now wasn't a good time he didn't want her to leave him.

"That's the difference between me and you I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, I had no problems expressing my love for you in front of our friends and family. But you, you couldn't say anything it took Nathan and your former girl friend to put a stop to something you didn't want to happen in the first place. What would you have done if they hadn't said anything and don't you lie to me" Brooke pleaded she didn't think she could take anymore lies.

"I don't know, ok I really don't know" Lucas cried he really didn't know what would have happened he hoped things could have been different but they weren't.

"You don't know how can you not know whether you would have married me. Is there someone else are you seeing someone else what over reasons could there be and please don't tell me it's Peyton" Brooke cried she didn't really want to know the answer that could kill her but she had to she had to know if there was another women.

"There is nobody in the world I'd rather be with than you" Lucas cried he knew that now he just hoped he wasn't too late.

"Really than why did all this happen if you really want to be with me, why didn't we get married" Brooke asked.

"Brooke I've seen what my life is like without you and I don't want to go through this again, please you have to believe me I can't be without you. I promise you if you take me back I'm going to spend the rest of our lives making this up to you" Lucas begged he couldn't lose her he just couldn't.

"Ok I believe you but if you ever lie to me again that's it its over" Brooke said she knew if she didn't at least try she'd wonder what if.

"I promise you Brooke I will never hurt you again so will you marry me today just us" Lucas asked hoping she'd say yes.

"Ok let's get married" Brooke smiled as he held her it felt good to be back in his arms.

"Ok you go get ready and I'll call Haley and Nathan to be our witnesses" Lucas said as Brooke headed upstairs.

After getting off the phone to Haley he was arranging things to get married her and thanks to the internet they could get married in their house it took him a couple of seconds to ordain Haley to commit the ceremony.

"Peyton what are you doing here" Lucas asked as he opened the door.

"We need to talk" Peyton said she knew he still loved her she could tell and know that things were over with Brooke maybe know that could be together.

"I've got nothing to say to you please just go" Lucas begged he couldn't have Brooke coming down now he didn't want nothing to come between them again.

"No I'm not going anywhere I love you and I know you love me" Peyton said as she walked through the door.

"You're wrong for one stupid moment I thought maybe I could be with you and yeah maybe the kiss did confuse things for me for a while but I know I love Brooke" Lucas said hoping she'd leave.

"Lucas after all these months we spent together that kiss mean something to you too I know it did because I felt it. We belong together Lucas and one day you're going to see that" Peyton smiled she knew she was right.

"That's where your wrong whatever it was I felt for you wasn't even an inch of what I feel for Brooke and so what if I felt something when we kissed I was confused about my feelings but not anymore so leave" Lucas said.

"You kissed her" Brooke cried as she came up behind him she came downstairs to tell him she was ready this was the last thing she expected.

"Brooke please let me explain" Lucas cried.

"Explain what all this time you and her of all people" Brooke cried.

"He loves me Brooke it's time for you to realise it" Peyton smirked part of her felt bad but she loved Lucas and wanted him back even if it means hurting her former best friend.

"Shut up Peyton and how many times do I have to tell you get out of my house" Lucas yelled.

"Ok, ok I'm going but you know where to find me" Peyton said as she left.

"Brooke I swear nothing is going on" Lucas pleaded she had to believe him she just had too.

"You and Peyton again how could I have been so stupid no wonder you was working all hours it was to spend time with her wasn't it" Brooke yelled she knew something was wrong she could feel it all this time.

"It wasn't like that I swear I was trying to finish my book and she just happened to be working there" Lucas said hoping she believed him.

"So why did you kiss her if nothing was going on" Brooke yelled.

"I don't know it just happened but I swear to you I'll never do anything to hurt you again, I love you not Peyton please forgive me" Lucas begged.

"I can't I hate you right now, I hate the way you've made me feel I always thought I wasn't good enough for you. Like I didn't deserve your kindness and love but now I've come to realise you don't deserve me. I have never felt like this in my entire life and there nothing you can say or do right now that will ever make me take you back we're done Lucas and this time it's for good" Brooke cried.

"Brooke please don't say that we can make this work I know we can you just have to trust me" Lucas begged.

"Trust you how can I trust you when you've been lying to me for months, you and Peyton deserve each other because as far as me and you we're done I'll call Haley to get my things in a few days I never want to see you again" Brooke said as she walked out the door she couldn't stay anymore her heart was broken in two.

"No please don't go I can't live without you" Lucas cried as he went after her.

After Brooke left she knew she had to get away for a while where no one would know where she was so she booked a flight to London to spend some time with her Nan she really missed her and she knew she'd be there for her no matter what.

End of chapter please review and tell me what you think thanks.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the reviews sorry for not updating sooner I went to America for a few weeks and when I got back I've just been really busy I'm going to try and update sooner.**

**Chapter 3**

After looking for what felt like hours Lucas still couldn't find Brooke he'd tried Nathan and Haley's and after Haley yelled at him for what felt like an eternity she finally told him she didn't know where Brooke was but he better make sure she's ok. Lucas had tried everywhere the last place was Brooke's mom Victoria he knew it was a long shot but he had to try and find her.

"What do you want" Victoria asked as she opened the door to the man who broke her daughter's heart.

"Is Brooke here" Lucas asked hoping she was he had to find her he just had too.

"No she's not and how could you do it I always thought you wasn't good enough for my little girl and I was right now my daughter is hurting because of you and that bitch Peyton.

"There's nothing going on with me and Peyton and I love your daughter. I know I've hurt her but I'm going to spend the rest of my life trying to make that up to her. But for you too judge me what type of mother was you you've never been there for Brooke" Lucas yelled even though he knew over the last few years Victoria had really been there for Brooke making up for all the years she wasn't there. He wasn't going to have her judging him.

"I know what I did in the past was wrong but I would never hurt her she's my everything now and she always has been I was too stupid to realise it earlier. But I'm not going to see her hurting anymore I've never seen her so hurt and before you ask I really don't know where she is she didn't tell me I just hope she's ok" Victoria said as she was about to close the door.

"Can you please just tell Brooke I'm sorry and I love her" Lucas cried as Victoria closed the door.

He didn't really know what to do know he was lost without Brooke he didn't really have any other place to go other than home. He knew he was going to be public enemy number one after what he'd done to Brooke and he really couldn't blame them.

After being on the plane for the last nine hours Brooke was feeling emotionally and physically drained she rang her uncle Tony before boarding the plane so she knew he'd be there to pick her up even though this was the worse she felt in her whole life she was happy she was seeing them again she loved coming to England when she was growing up and she just really wanted her Nan right now.

When Tony picked her up he knew she was sad and he hated seeing his niece in pain. He couldn't understand why anyone could hurt her she was such a nice good person if he ever saw this Lucas guy he was going to give him a piece of his mind.

"Mom's got your room ready, you must be jetlagged" Tony said trying to start conversation Brooke was normally so bubbly he just wanted her to be herself again.

"Yeah, I'm sorry to call on such short notice" Brooke sighed she'd never felt like this in her whole life.

"Its fine mom loves it when your here I just wish it was on nicer circumstances" Tony sighed.

"Yeah me too" Brooke cried she didn't mean to this was just all too much.

When they got to her Nan's house she saw her Nan waiting for her she really missed her and with everything that's happened she just really needed her right now.

"Oh Brooke come here" Nan said as she saw her granddaughter for the first time in three years.

"I've missed you so much" Brooke cried as she hugged her.

"I've missed you too so much, Tony take Brooke's things upstairs while we chat" Nan told her oldest son as they walked through the door.

"So Brooke what happened I asked Tony and he told me Lucas was cheating on you" Nan asked she'd never met Lucas and really hoped it wasn't true but the state of Brooke she had a feeling it was.

"Nan I don't know what to do he said it didn't mean anything but how can I believe him after what happened I've never felt so humiliated in my whole life. How could he hurt me like that didn't I mean anything to him" Brooke cried.

"Oh honey if he can't see what a great person you are then he's not worth your tears and if he was cheating on you with Peyton then he's not the man you want to be with anyway" Nan said as she hugged her she hated seeing her in pain like this.

"I just love him so much and the thought of not being with him is killing me. I was supposed to be married right now I just can't believe this is happening. I knew there was something wrong I could feel it I just never in a million years thought it be this" Brooke cried.

"Don't worry you can stay here as long as you want I'm going to help you get through this" Nan said as she held her it was going to take time but she knew Brooke was going to be ok because she was strong just like her mother.

"Thanks Nan I think I'm going to try and get some sleep it was a really long flight" Brooke sighed as she got up she knew she wasn't going to be getting much sleep but she had to at least try she was starting to feel sick and she didn't want to her Nan to worry.

"Ok sweetheart but if you need me I'm here" Nan said as she hugged her granddaughter.

After another night of drinking himself to sleep Lucas knew he couldn't go on like this he need to find Brooke and make things right again he couldn't live without her and these last couple of days made him realise how much he needed Brooke in his life. Because without her he was a mess he just couldn't think of where she could be.

"Hi Lucas" Peyton smiled as Lucas finally opened the door.

"What are you doing here" Lucas asked.

"I wanted to see if you wanted to go and have a drink and we could hang out like we used to" Peyton smiled.

"Are you serious do you really think that's going to happened I lost the love of my life because of you all I've been doing this last few days is trying to find her. You don't even get what you've done do you I hate you, you've ruined my life and I never want to see you again" Lucas yelled as he stormed past her he knew everything wasn't all her fault but he couldn't even be in the same presence as her right now.

After tossing and turning for the last couple of hours Brooke knew it wasn't going to happen so she decided to go downstairs and make herself something to eat to see if that would help her sleep she hadn't eaten for the last few days and she knew that wasn't healthy.

"Hi Brooke would you like a cup of tea" Tony asked as he put the kettle on.

"No thanks" Brooke said as she started feeling dizzy and needed to lean on the chair.

"Woow Brooke, mom come in here" Tony said as he caught his falling niece in his arms.

"Oh god Tony we've got to get Brooke to the hospital" Nan cried as she saw her unconscious granddaughter she just hoped she was ok.

When they arrived at the hospital Brooke was falling in and out of conciseness. After Nan filled out numerous hospital forms for Brooke to get care from the hospital thankfully Brooke had a duel passport because god forbid if she was refused treatment because of her legal status in the country. After Brooke was admitted to a room Nan knew she had to call her daughter because as much as she knew Brooke didn't want anyone knowing where she was, if something was seriously wrong her daughter need to be there because she knew if this was her daughter she'd want to know.

"Nan" Brooke cried as her Nan came in the room she'd never been so scared she really hoped she wasn't dyeing things couldn't get any worse right now.

"Oh my baby, you scared me" Nan cried as she hugged her granddaughter.

"Nan I was so scared I thought I was going to die" Brooke cried.

"Don't worry sweetheart the doctor will be here in a minute and she'll tell you what's wrong you're probably stressed with what's been going on" Nan said as she wiped her granddaughter's tears.

"Hi Miss Davis your probably wondering what's going on" Dr Green asked as she came in the room.

"Yeah the thought crossed my mind" Brooke said she really hoped it wasn't serious.

"Well congratulations you're going to be a mom" Dr Green smiled.

"I'm what but how I was told I couldn't have kids" Brooke cried she couldn't be pregnant it wasn't possible.

"Well I don't know who told you that but from the test I done your about three months along" Dr Green smiled as she wrote down some notes.

"Three months I'm so confused, wait is the baby ok" Brooke asked she couldn't handle if she lost her child as well.

"Everything's fine I think this was the babies way of telling you to take care of yourself. Your blood pressure was a bit high when you came in its stable know but we'd like to keep you in for a few days to keep an eye on everything but you both should be ok now" Dr Green smiled.

"Wow Nan I'm going to be a mom" Brooke smiled even though everything was falling apart around her she was going to be a mom and that's the one thing she's always wanted.

End of chapter please review and tell me what you think thanks.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for the review sorry for not updating sooner this chapter was quite hard to write.**

**Chapter 4**

Brooke had been in hospital now for the last twenty four hours and they still wanted to keep her in for another night to bring her blood pressure down she tried to explain to them she didn't like hospitals but with the doctors and her Nan telling her she had to stay in she really didn't have any other option.

As soon as Victoria landed at Heathrow she booked a taxi to take her to Barnet Hospital. After her mom rang and told her Brooke was in the hospital she knew she needed to be there Brooke needed her right now. She thought about telling Lucas but she couldn't if she did Brooke would never speak to her again Victoria was actually felling bad for Lucas as much as she should hate him for what he did to her daughter he seemed really hurt and lost without Brooke in his life.

"Mom where is she" Victoria asked as she ran though the hospital doors and saw her mom talking to one of the nurses.

"Victoria I should have called you back she's ok come this way Brooke is probably going to yell at me for worrying you but you needed to know" Penelope said as she hugged her oldest child.

"Mom what are you doing here" Brooke asked shocked to see her mom walk through the door.

"Mom called me she was so worried, Brooke why did you come to England" Victoria asked as she hugged her daughter she'd never been so worried in her whole life.

"I had to mom apart from Tree Hill this is the only place I feel safe and loved" Brooke cried as her mom held her even though they've been through there problems in the past Brooke loved her mom and now they were close like they should have been all these years.

"Mom was really there for you growing up wasn't she" Victoria asked already knowing the answer.

"Yeah I don't know what I'd do if I lost her. Mom did Nan tell you what was wrong" Brooke asked needing to know how much her mom knew.

"No I rushed straight here to see you I was so worried I can't lose you Brooke I know I haven't been the best mom to you and I'm going to spend the rest of my life making that up to you" Victoria cried as she held her it killed her the hurt and pain she caused her daughter all these years.

"Mom I'm ok it was just the stress of everything that's happened I should be going home to day" Brooke said hoping the doctor did let her go she didn't really like staying in hospitals.

"By home you mean here with Nan" Victoria asked already knowing the answer she knew Brooke couldn't go home with everything that's going on.

"Yeah I can't go home right now mom and I'm not sure if I ever want to. Mom please tell me Lucas doesn't know where I am" Brooke asked she really couldn't handle it if he found out.

"No, no one knows I came straight here Brooke I'm going to stay in London for a while Millie can handle the business right now you need me here" Victoria said Brooke needed her more than the business did.

"Ok mom please don't tell Millie where I am I really don't want anyone to find me" Brooke sighed she needed time to digest everything. Eventually she knew she'd have to return to Tree Hill it was her home and her life was there but right now all she wanted to do was be with her Nan. At least until the baby was born and then she'll decide what she's going to do.

Lucas didn't really know what to do anymore he'd been looking for Brooke for days now and he still wasn't any closer to finding her. He'd been to Victoria's house every day since Brooke left and now it didn't seem like anyone was home he couldn't blame Victoria for leaving he could tell she was getting annoyed with him coming over all the time but he had to find Brooke he needed her in his life. These past few days had been the worst days of his life.

Lucas couldn't take it anymore so he decided to go to Tric to have a few drinks to try and numb the pain he knew it wouldn't help but he couldn't think of anything else to do his world had ended. He should be married right now to the love his life instead he was at a bar drinking shot after shot just so he could forget at least for a couple of hours.

"Lucas what are you doing" Nathan asked as he made his way to his brother he'd never seen him like this he couldn't believe it when Chase called him to see if he could help.

"What does it look like I'm doing" Lucas mumbled as he took another shot of whiskey Chase had tried to stop him but this was his mothers club and if he wanted a drink he was going to have one.

"Come on Luke this isn't going to bring Brooke back" Nathan said as he sat next to his brother.

"She's not coming home have you not heard she left me, and I can't find her anywhere where is she Nathan" Lucas yelled as the tears streamed down his face.

"Luke we'll find her I promise come on bro let's get you home" Nathan said as he helped his brother up Nathan knew exactly how Lucas was feeling he'd lost Haley for three months during the first year of marriage. Lucas was there for him then and he was going to be there for him now.

"What am I going to do Nate I can't live without her" Lucas cried he'd never felt this much pain in his whole life.

"She'll come back Luke I know she will she's just hurting right now" Nathan said as he was driving Lucas home he thought about bringing him home with him but he knew he couldn't Haley was still mad at him for what he'd to Brooke.

"I can't live without her, how could I have been so stupid why didn't I just tell Peyton I loved Brooke and I would never do anything to hurt her if I could just go back and tell myself what an idiot I was being I wouldn't be in this mess right now" Lucas cried.

"Lucas tomorrow I'm going to help you, you can't live like this and if Brooke comes home to this it's not going to look good is it. I'll be over in the morning with Jamie and we'll do something with your hair" Nathan said as he helped his brother to the bed he didn't know what Lucas was thinking with the hairstyle it didn't suit him at all.

Brooke was allowed home now she thought about telling her mom about the pregnancy but she couldn't it was too soon and she didn't want anyone to know at least until she'd had time to digest the information. Her Nan told her she wouldn't say anything until Brooke was ready for people to know but she hoped it be soon because she hated lying to her daughter.

"You know this used to be my room" Victoria smiled as she helped Brooke to her bed.

"I know Nan told me when I was younger. When I moved here when I was six she said I could make the room my own I hope you don't mind" Brooke asked she knew it had been years since Victoria had been home.

"No I don't mind Brooke you know I'm sorry about what happened I should never have abandoned you" Victoria cried.

"I know mom and even though I was mad at you I couldn't understand how any mother could do that to her child but it was the best thing that ever happened to me if you hadn't I wouldn't know Nan and I couldn't live without her" Brooke smiled she'd forgiven her mom and she hoped one day her mom would forgive herself.

"We'll I better go help mom with the diner, you get some rest and I'll bring you some food" Victoria smiled at her daughter it felt strange but good to be back home it had been so long since she's been home and with Brooke being here it would give her the chance to make things right with her family again especially her mom.

"Victoria is Brooke resting" Penelope asked as her daughter came in the kitchen.

"Yes mom I told her I'd bring her up some diner. Mom I never said this before but thank you for taking care of Brooke all these years I just wish one day she'll love me as much as she loves you" Victoria said as she sat next to her Mom.

"Victoria Brooke loves you she always has even when you wasn't there for her, her heart is so pure she doesn't have a hurtful bone in her body that's why it hurts me she's in pain right now" Penelope sighed as she put the potatoes down the food could wait she needed to talk to her daughter.

"Mom it kills me the pain she's in and I know I've caused her a lot of pain first by leaving her here and then taking her away from here for Tree Hill if I had left her here she wouldn't be hurting right now" Victoria cried.

"Victoria the five years Brooke lived here were so special to me and the summers she always came to visit meant the world to me but as much as I loved having her here you are her mother and I know it kills you the hurt you've caused Brooke. But I knew eventually you would see what your missing and be a mother and I was right" Penelope cried as she held her daughter it's been so long since she held her she wished they'd had this talk years ago.

"Mom as much as Brooke needs you right now she does need to come home her life is in Tree Hill" Victoria said.

"I know and she'll go home in her own time when she's ready she'll know but right now she's too broken and we have to help heal her" Penelope said and started on the food again.

"Mom as much as I hate to admit it, the only person who can heal her heart is Lucas until she can forgive him or finally let him go she'll never be able to move on" Victoria said.

"And in time she'll see Lucas to sort everything out and if he really knew her he'd know where she'd be I expect him to figure it out soon enough and if and when he does its up to Brooke what she does" Penelope said as finished the diner.

Lucas had tossed and turned all night and he couldn't sleep it felt different without Brooke snuggled up to him. He heard the door go and he knew that was Nathan and he really hoped he had some fresh coffee with him because right now he needed something to keep him going.

"Lucas we need to talk" Peyton said as she made her way through his bedroom.

"Get out, you've ruined my life" Lucas yelled as he heard her voice he didn't have to look up to see who it was.

"Lucas please" Peyton said as she made her way over to him.

"You don't get it do you, do you have any idea what you've done I've lost the love of my life because of you I hate you and I never want to see you again I wish you'd just stayed in LA because I don't want or need you here you've ruined my life" Lucas said as he turned over he couldn't look at her one second more.

Peyton couldn't believe what she just heard she knew he was sad with Brooke leaving but to hate her because of it she realised what she'd done so she left. Haley was right she should never have come home because right now she really had no one.

End of chapter please review and tell me what you think thanks.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks for the reviews sorry for not updating sooner I'm gonna try and update quicker. **

**Chapter 5**

It's been three months now since Brooke's been in London with her Nan her mom went home a month ago she had too the offices in New York needed her. Brooke spent most of her time with her cousin Toby they were like brother and sister and Brooke loved that she could spend time with him just like she used too. He's been helping her get ready for the baby she still couldn't believe she was going to be a mom she thought about finding out what she was having but didn't want to ruin the surprise so Toby coloured the spare room with neutral colors.

After Victoria went back to the US Brooke decided she'd do her designs from home. As much as she missed Tree Hill she loved being back in London she got to spend time with her family and got to do all the things she used to do as a kid. The pregnancy was going well Brooke thought about telling her mom about the baby but she couldn't the only people that know is her Nan and Toby and Toby only found out because he saw her leaving the hospital and put two and two together.

"Hey Brooke dad wants to know if you want to come to the Arsenal game with us" Toby asked as he walked in her room.

"Toby how can I, I can't keep wearing baggy clothes its summer now Uncle Tony is going to know I'm pregnant" Brooke sighed it would be good to go to a game she hadn't been since she was a kid.

"Brooke dad's going to find out eventually it's time to tell the people who care about you" Toby said as he hugged his cousin he hated seeing her hurt if he could see this Lucas guy he'd give him a piece of his mind.

"I know I just don't think I'm ready" Brooke cried she knew she'd have to tell him, she'd have to tell everyone eventually but she couldn't not right now.

"Why Brooke, I know you just want me and Nan to know but why, why not your mom, my dad we'd be here for you. Please talk to me Brooke you know we can tell each other anything" Toby asked as he held her.

"I'm scared, scared that Lucas will find out and leave Peyton so he can be a father I can't be with someone who doesn't want me I can't be second best anymore. I know I have to tell him he has a child but I can't not right now I couldn't take him only wanting to be with me because we have a child my heart couldn't take that" Brooke cried.

"Oh Brooke that's not going to happen dad isn't going to say anything and please don't cry over Lucas he doesn't deserve your tears if he can't see what a special, good person you are then he doesn't disserve you" Toby said as he wiped her tears he couldn't understand how anyone could hurt her she was such a good person.

"Ok I'll come but I'm not promising anything what time are we meeting your dad" Brooke asked she knew she couldn't spend all her time in London in her room it was time to face the world.

"Awesome dad said he'd meet us at the supporters bar an hour before kickoff" Toby smiled he knew this would be good for Brooke.

Lucas was going out of his mind he still couldn't find Brooke and it's been months since she left. He'd even been to New York and Victoria refused to let him in not that he could blame her he'd broken her daughter's heart. Things with Haley had improved he didn't think she'd ever forgive him for hurting her best friend and making her leave. Lucas knew part of Haley forgiving him was for Jamie and the fact that Haley was pregnant and her hormones were all over the place. Lucas knew Haley was missing Brooke and she tried her best to hide it from him not wanting him to hurt even more but he couldn't get Brooke of his mind even if he wanted to.

Lucas was cleaning up their house he knew he couldn't live like this anymore how would it look if Brooke came home to this not that he was expecting her to come home anytime soon. He knew he had to clean himself up and he decided to start by cleaning their bedroom. It was while he was putting stuff away in the closet that he noticed a box full of Brooke's things from her childhood. As he was looking through the box he realized where Brooke was and he couldn't believe he hadn't thought of it before he knew how much Brooke loved her time with her grandmother when she was younger.

Lucas knew he had to go to London even if she refused to speak to him he had to at least try he couldn't live without her anymore. He rang Nathan to tell him he was going to London and asked him to watch the team while he was gone. He didn't know when he's be back he hoped to come back right away but he'd wait forever if he had to he couldn't be without Brooke anymore.

Lucas got the first flight out to London and he knew this was going to be the longest nine hours of his life he just wanted to be with Brooke right now. If only he thought of London sooner he wouldn't have been going through all this pain these last few months.

Brooke was getting ready to go to the game her Nan was a bit worried about her she didn't think it was safe for a pregnant woman to go to a football match. Brooke had to assure here she'd be fine Toby and Uncle Tony wouldn't let anything happen to her. They were also going to be sitting in the family section so she knew she'd be safe and it's been so long she didn't want to come to London and not go to a game she spent most of her early childhood going with her Uncle and Toby it be just like old times.

Toby was coming to pick Brooke up in about an hour he's going to drive them to the train station then they'll get on the train to the game trying to park at the ground was murder according to Toby and they'd never make the game in time.

While Brooke was getting ready her phone rang private number and she wondered who that could be no one knew her new number apart from her mom so she could tell her what was going on with the company.

"Hello" Brooke answered gingerly.

"Hi Brooke" Haley said at last being able to talk to her it took a lot for Haley to get the number of Victoria after she promised she wouldn't tell Lucas. Haley just really wanted to talk to Brooke and make sure she was ok.

"Hales how, how did you get this number" Brooke asked shocked it's not like she didn't want to talk to Haley she did she missed her and Jamie but she couldn't she knew if she spoke to them it would just make staying away harder.

"Your mom gave it to me are you ok Brooke I've been going out of my mind with worry" Haley cried she was doing that a lot lately the littlest thing could set her off.

"I'm sorry hales I just couldn't really speak to anyone, please don't give Lucas my number I can't talk to him right now" Brooke begged she couldn't handle it if he rang her too.

"I won't, Brooke when are you coming home I'm going to have the baby soon and Jamie really wants to see you he misses you" Haley asked hoping she'd come home soon.

"I can't not right now" Brooke said as she herd Toby yell up the stairs "Hales I got to go my cousins taking me out I'll ring you when I get back" she said as she hung up. Brooke knew she'd have to ring Haley back she needed to talk to her best friend and see how she was and she didn't want Haley to stress it wouldn't be good for the baby.

When Lucas arrived at Heathrow he got a taxi too Brooke's Nan's house he just hoped she still lived there not that Brooke ever said anything about her moving he just hoped his instincts were right and Brooke was there because if she wasn't he didn't really know what else to do.

As Lucas arrived at the house Lucas couldn't believe what he saw Brooke was there but she wasn't alone as she got in some guys car. Lucas knew know he was too late and he couldn't blame her maybe she did disserve someone who wouldn't hurt her. She looked happy and he couldn't come and break her world again.

Lucas knew he couldn't go back home not without her he couldn't take that pain he had to get away he needed to try and make himself the man he knew Brooke disserved because right now he was a mess.

Brooke thought for sure she saw Lucas in the car as it drove past but she just shook her head she really needed to sleep when she got home after the game because she was starting to see things that aren't there.

End of chapter please review and tell me what you think thanks


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks for the reviews sorry for not updating sooner I've been really busy I'm going to try and update sooner.**

**Chapter 6**

It's been a couple of weeks now since Brooke's been back in contact with Haley and it felt good to be talking to Haley again she missed her best friend. Brooke felt bad for not being there for Haley with the pregnancy and for not telling her she was pregnant too but she couldn't she couldn't have Lucas finding out right now.

"Hi Hales" Brooke smiled as she answered her phone.

"Hi Brooke, I know I've asked you quite a few times now if you plan on coming home anytime soon but I thought I'd ask again to see if you've changed your mind. I'm having the baby any day and I really want my best friend to be there" Haley asked for what felt like the hundredth time she really missed Brooke over the last few months.

"I can't Hales, I really want to be in Tree Hill with you but I can't take seeing Lucas I just can't" Brooke cried she felt bad for not being there for Haley and she knew Jamie missed her too but she couldn't risk seeing Lucas not right now.

"Brooke, Lucas has gone he packed some stuff up about a week ago he left a note saying he couldn't stay any more, Nathan's been trying to get hold of him. We don't know where he went but Nathan said he took his passport so he could be anywhere" Haley said she was worried about him it was so unlike Lucas to just take off like that.

"Hales can I ring you back later I need time to figure things out" Brooke asked she couldn't believe Lucas would leave Tree Hill she couldn't understand what was going on.

"Ok Brooke please think about coming home we miss you I'll ring you later" Haley said as she hung up she really wished Brooke would come home she really missed her best friend.

Brooke sat there for a few minutes thinking about everything she could go home to Tree Hill now with Lucas being gone but could she stay in their house without him she didn't think she could do that. If she was to go home she'd have to buy a new house to live in.

"Hi Brooke I couldn't help over hearing your convocation with Haley and if you want I'll come home with you to Tree Hill" Nan asked she knew Brooke needed to go home and if she went with her it might help her make the right decision.

"But Nan you said you'd never leave England" Brooke asked shocked as much as she'd love her Nan to come with her she didn't want her Nan to feel obligated to come.

"Brooke I love you and if you need me I'm going to be there, I can home when everything is ok with you, I'm not going to let you go on your own" Nan said as she hugged her granddaughter.

"Ok I best ring Haley and tell her I'm coming home" Brooke smiled she never thought she'd be saying that again but it would be good to go home.

"Ok I'm just going to ring your uncle and ask him to watch my house for me. Then I'll go up stairs and back me some things.

While Brooke was packing Toby walked in with some bags "Before you say no I'm coming with you I can't let you and Nan go on your own" Toby said as he placed his bags down.

"Ok you can come we're going to have to stay at a hotel until I can find a new place to live. How are you going to get a visa" Brooke asked she was lucky she had dual nationality.

"I've booked a tourist visa for 3 months so I should still be in the US when the baby comes. Then I'll have to fly home unless I meet someone over there you never know hell I am a pretty good looking guy" Toby smirked.

"Yeah, yeah big head, thanks Toby for doing this for me" Brooke said as she hugged him.

"Brooke I want to be there for you and hell this will give me a chance to see something other than London" Toby said he helped Brooke finish packing.

Lucas has been in Australia for about a week now he was grateful for Andy giving him the keys to his place and for not telling anyone where he was he just needed some time to himself. Lucas needs time to come to terms with loosing Brooke he never thought he'd feel pain like this. These past six months have been the worst of his entire life and it was all his fault if only he was honest with Brooke about Peyton she'd be his wife now instead of with some guy in London.

Lucas knew eventually he'll have to tell Nathan and Haley where he was but he couldn't not right now. All he could think about was Brooke he couldn't understand how she could be with someone else. Not that he could blame her with what he put her through with Peyton. But all he wanted now was Brooke but maybe she did deserve someone better because right now he was a mess.

Andy has got Lucas a job at one of his offices in Melbourne he starts today he thought about ringing Andy and telling him he wasn't ready but he couldn't live off Andy he had to pay his way and this could help him get back on track he couldn't keep living like this.

"Hi I'm Amanda you must be Lucas, Andy's told me all about you, and we've set you up an office over here." Amanda said as she showed Lucas around.

"Hi, thanks for hiring me on such short notice" Lucas said as he followed her around.

"It's now problem Andy told me you were working on a book and needed new scenery" Amanda said as she led him to his office.

"Yeah something like that" Lucas said as he took a seat it was going to be strange working here instead of a school but Andy was right maybe this will be the best place for him to write his book and work as a journalist he had a degree in journalism it was time for him to use it.

When Brooke arrived in Tree Hill Haley and Nathan met them at the airport. Brooke's Nan wanted to ring Victoria to tell her they were in Tree Hill but Brooke didn't want her mom to know just yet. Nan hated lying to her daughter but she respected Brooke's wishes.

"Brooke" Haley smiled as she saw Brooke coming through the turnstiles.

"Hi tutor mom, Nate" Brooke said as she made her way over to them.

"Oh my god you're pregnant" Haley yelled as she noticed Brooke's very pregnant belly.

"Shh Hales I don't want the whole world to know" Brooke said the last thing she wanted was for it to be in the press.

"Brooke we need to talk" Haley said as they walked away from everyone.

"Ok, Nan, Toby I'll be back in a minute" Brooke said as Haley grabbed her arm and started walking her away from everyone she was expecting this as she never told Haley about the baby.

"Hi, I'm Nathan how about I take you both to the car while they talk they could be a while" Nathan said as he helped Brooke's Nan with their luggage.

"Brooke how could you not say anything" Haley asked as they sat down.

"I'm sorry Haley I just couldn't, I wanted to more than anything but I just couldn't" Brooke cried maybe it was a bad idea coming home.

"Why Brooke I would have been here for you" Haley said she couldn't believe all these things happening.

"I know that hales and I love you for that, but I couldn't ask you to choose between me and Lucas and that's what I would have been doing if I told you. I couldn't ask you to keep this from him and right now I'm not ready for him to know I know eventually he'll have to know but right now my heart couldn't take seeing him and the stress it would bring me wouldn't be good for my baby and I have to put he or she first. I never ever thought I'd be a mom with what the doctors told me it's a miracle baby Hales and I can't risk losing the baby it's all I have in the world" Brooke cried.

"It's ok Brooke I'm going to be there for you and the baby and I know you don't want to here this but whenever Lucas comes back he's going to want to be here for the baby too" Haley said as she hugged her best friend.

"Thanks tutor mom, I promise you I will tell Lucas about the baby just not right now" Brooke said as she wiped her eyes.

Even though Brooke wasn't ready to tell Lucas just yet she knew in her heart she could never keep their child from him forever he had a right to get to know their child and be a father to him or her. But right now she just couldn't be around him, and she didn't think she ever could he just broke her heart too much. They would just have to come up with away so he could be there for the baby.

End of chapter please review and tell me what you think thanks.


End file.
